Search - Masters of Horror: The Washingtonians on DVD

Often amusing episode of MOH

N. Durham | Philadelphia, PA | 03/24/2008

(3 out of 5 stars)

"Based on a Bentley Little short story, The Washingtonians is an often amusing episode of Masters of Horror that puts a new kind of spin on the founding fathers. What if George Washington was a cult leader of child eating cannibals? That's what Mike (Johnathon Schaech) finds out after accidentally uncovering a hidden letter behind a portrait that was written by Washington himself, and soon enough he's being hunted by present day followers of Washington's ways, that will do anything to keep their secrets safe. The more ridiculous that The Washingtonians gets, the better it gets for the most part, and when it borderlines on complete and utter absurdity before the credits start to roll. Directed by the often underrated Peter Medak (The Changeling, Species II), The Washingtonians is nevertheless gory, enjoyable, and entertaining, and in those respects alone, that's all that really matters. All in all, as long as you don't take it too seriously, The Washingtonians is an amusing ride."

A Real Horror....but not in a good way

The Jaundiced Eye | Texas, USA | 12/28/2007

(1 out of 5 stars)

"Several of the MOH episodes have been quite entertaining, so I decided to give this one a try. It starts off in promising fashion, with some creepy scenes and atmosphere, but it rapidly becomes a ridiculous farce. The "actress" portraying the daughter is the most annoying member of a cast that wallows in mediocrity. She has no apparent talent other than to scream piercingly. I found myself watching the final scenes in fervent hope that she would meet a ghastly end, but as with everything else in this poorly conceived and executed mess, I was ultimately disappointed.



If the concept of a "federal" SWAT team (called in by a...are you ready for this?...concerned history professor) summarily executing a gathering of flesh-eating lunatics wearing powdered wigs and colonial costumes, in order to conceal the fact that George Washington was a child-eating cannibal seems plausible or even remotely interesting to you, then by all means waste an hour of your time, as I did, wading through this silly, disappointing, amateurish farce.



To be honest, the general concept was so outlandish that, in more expert hands, it might have been entertaining. Too bad that Eli Roth or Robert Rodriguez weren't chosen to direct it. The scenes through the door peephole of the colonial cannibals in powdered wigs attempting to appear menacing with their rotted teeth and painted red lips (in true Mick Jagger fashion) was mildly amusing, but ultimately, the atrocious acting, laughable script, and wretched direction summarily execute (in true SWAT style) any chance of enjoyment.



You have been warned. This is a really lousy episode of MOH and the daughter character alone will make you root for the cannibals. Suffer through it at your own peril."

GORY BIT OF BLACK COMEDY

Tim Janson | Michigan | 11/09/2007

(4 out of 5 stars)

"I have to admit, The Washingtonians had me going until about halfway through the episode. I thought I was watching a straight horror, but even better, it turned out to be an outrageous black comedy-horror that is deftly handled by Director Peter Medak. The teleplay was written by Richard Chizmar and co-star, Jonathan Schaech, and based on a story by Bentley Little. Mike and Pam Franks have inherited Mike's grandmother's house in Virginia and move there with their daughter Amy. The house is filled with all sorts of antiques and early American artifacts. Mike makes a surprise discovery behind a painting of George Washington. Hidden beneath the canvas is a letter in which the writer talks about eating the flesh of children. It is signed with the initials "G.W." and also includes a fork that appears to be carved out of human bone.



Mike shows the letter to Samuel, a friend of his grandfathers, and Samuel asks...no, DEMANDS that mike sell the letter. Mike refuses and that's when the trouble begins. Soon a gang of men dressed in Colonial American costumes is banging on his door, demanding he turn over the letter. Mike and his family flee back to their home but the trouble doesn't end. He shares the letter with a history professor friend who tells him his family is in great danger from the Washingtonians! The professor reveals that George Washington, the father of our country, was, in truth, a cannibal! George had a taste for virgin flesh and his symbol of a "cherry" tree made me laugh out loud and realize the director had pulled one over on me. Cherry tree...virgin flesh...that's gold!



Mike soon finds out that this cannibalistic cult of Washingtonians still thrives today and his grandparents were both members. Does mike turn over the letter and keep Washington's secret safe or does he keep it hidden and become the main course at their next gathering?



I loved how the story drew on Da Vinci Code influence. In that blockbuster, the secret society are protecting the truth about Jesus, here they are protecting the outrageous secret that Washington ate human flesh! He apparently acquired the taste during that hostile winter at Valley Forge...



What makes the episode work so well is that the performances are all played pretty straight...all except for the various Washingtonians who are over-the-top in their performances. They pinch the cheeks of little Amy and tell her she's "cute enough to eat" and they mean it! Oh yes...there is plenty of gore as the Washingtonians much one various body parts and entrails...we even get to see Thomas Jefferson torn to pieces. Terrifying but downright hilarious. One of the best episodes of season two!



REVIEWED BY TIM JANSON"

Doesn't Match the Short Story, But is a Fun Ride

S. Sommerville | Raleigh, NC | 11/11/2007

(3 out of 5 stars)

"Bentley Little's short story of the same title is a classic, original black humor-ish horror tale. I was stoked that they decided to bring this one to the screen, and did end up enjoying the film. The imagery was terrific, but the altered ending and lack of development kept it from taking the original tale to the next level.



The gory scenes of cannibalism with eerie pale faced, powder-wigged Gentlemen going to town on the corpses were shot just right. The dialouge was decent and the acting was mediocre, rather forgettable, really save for the Washingtonians themselves who come off as creepy and feisty.



Worth a look if you enjoy tongue in cheek horror flicks and have a twisted sense of humor.



"